The title of this post is one of my most recent realizations.  I’ve goofed and I’ve flubbed on this journey, done things and eaten things that weren’t optimal.  I’m human.  And I’m still moving forward.

“Consistency carries the day.”

So today at work, I noticed myself walking kind of fast.  With a sure step.  Something I haven’t been able to do for some time, because of pain in my knees and whole legs in general.  If I were to try and assess what has brought about this improvement, I would say that it’s my water regimen, which has lubricated my joints and helped flush out stored toxins, and the radical change in my diet, of what and how much I eat now.

I’ve settled into a routine of drinking a quart of water upon rising, then 1/2 to an hour later having one or two pieces of fruit (lately it’s been bananas, apples or oranges- typical, affordable fare). I try to make sure that I have finished my second quart of water by the time I leave work, which is usually by around 3pm.  Then one more small meal of fruit or salad in the late afternoon/early evening with the last two quarts of water.  And that’s it.  On weekends, I try to keep to the same time schedule for that.  The thing is, I’m never really hungry.  Hunger is a strange concept.  Much of what we consider to be hunger is actually either thirst, or the body’s detoxification process in the stomach.  I have heard that true hunger (even after a seven day water fast, I have never felt it) is actually a feeling in the back of the throat.  The desire for food is mental, usually.  To take control of my eating and not have it to take control of me, I had to literally lose interest in food.

This may sound harsh.

Although I have linked to them, this blog is not the place to go for recipes.  I had to come to terms with the fact that as a recovering food addict in the weight loss process, I could not make food a focus.  It’s more a means to an end.  I had to let it go.

I had to decide what I want and then decide how much I was willing to pay for it.

Feeling good is worth not having whatever treat, or meal in that moment.  Because after you eat that treat or meal, the feeling is over.  When you’re really healthy, however, you feel good every minute of every day, all the time.  You feel good enough to do the things you love to do.  You feel good when you see your reflection in the mirror.  To me, that’s worth all the chocolate ice cream and pizza on earth.

It’s been less than a month since I re-committed to my discipline, and I feel much much better when I stand, walk and move.  The body always works towards health, and when you just get out of the way and let it do what it was designed to do…amazing.

I will be posting pictures of myself soon.  One of the things I always say when embarking on a journey of this kind is, “Stay out of the mirror.”  In essence, avoid the self-judgment that comes from looking at yourself and seeing the effects of what you did before, that you no longer do, but the outward appearance hasn’t changed yet.  It can be discouraging to see this.  But photos serve a purpose when looking back, also.  They show progress, which can be very motivating at times when you think nothing’s really happening, or it’s not happening fast enough.  So pictures will come.  Documenting the journey will become invaluable later on, when I can see (and show) where I was.

Thanks for coming along with me on my journey.