Bless me internet, for I have sinned.  It’s been two weeks since my last blog post.  I’ve tried to chronicle my journey before, always stopping at times like these.  But what makes this time different is that I promised myself I would write even when I struggle with what I’m trying to do.  Even if I “fail.”  What we think of as failure is really just a data point.  Just information.  I will keep questioning, keep exposing, keep analyzing and keep sharing mine.  Someone needs this. That makes this worth it, even if that someone is just me.

It’s May 31st and I’m reflecting on my progress over the past month, or lack of it, to be more accurate.  I’ve allowed myself to lose focus.  I’ve placed the pressures of the day ahead of my own needs.  I’ve lost sight of what brings me joy.  I’ve sought comfort in food.

Every Wednesday, I weigh in, regardless of my actions over the seven days prior.  I need to see and to be able to record the truth.  And the truth is I’ve been hovering around the same weight all month.  Which isn’t the worst thing that could’ve happened.  Thankfully, all in all, I haven’t gained either.  But the progress I planned for didn’t happen.  Staying vegan is the one thing that I would say saved me this month.  No matter what I ate, I made sure it didn’t contain a meat or dairy product, which has kept my fat and calorie intake lower. But the fat content in my meals has been higher than I need it to be for weight loss.  If nothing else was reinforced to me these past few weeks, it is that, just because something is classified as “healthy,” or even vegan, doesn’t make it the best option for losing weight.

Stress levels are declining now, and pretty soon I will be able to enjoy eight weeks of sovereignty (summer vacation).  It’s time to refocus and make a push to the next level.  I’ve experienced some pretty nice gems since losing the first 35 lbs.  Gems are what I call compliments and other nice things that happen in direct relation to my physical changes.  Now I have to follow my own advice, dig into what I love, and step out a little further onto the path.  Are you with me?

Thank you thank you thank you for reading my blog posts!